The only other people he follows are other women named “Emily Rose,” and also about fifteen women called “Linda Blair,” including “TheRealLindaBlair,” whom I assume is the actress from The Exorcist.

Which actually makes me want to say something:
Yes, this is my real name. And I really like my name. It’s pretty, short, and simple. I never have to repeat it, I never have to spell it, and when I get married I’m never going to change it. But up until 2005 people would just nod and smile, not pointedly ask, “Are you possessed by demons?” Another thing: The Exorcism of Emily Rose, while based on a true story, isn’t based on the life of a girl named Emily Rose. Her name was Anneliese Michel; she was a German teenager who died in the 1970s. Some Sony exec decided he liked the name and so now I can’t introduce myself to anyone without hearing “Oh, like the exorcism!” It was four years ago, people. And it was a mediocre movie.

I guess my point is this: other Emily Roses, if you are reading, I feel your pain. And you too, Freddy Kruegers of the world, Michael Meyerses, and especially, especially you, women named Linda Blair.