DayPage: June 14, 2008
June142008

There are no laws in Queens.

  • Two weeks ago:
  • Manhattan bouncer: ID, please?
  • Me: [hands over badly-laminated fake, my hands shaking] Here you go.
  • Manhattan bouncer: What's your zipcode?
  • Me: Ahh... you know, can I just have it back and leave? No harm done.
  • Manhattan bouncer: I'll tell you where you can get it back. At 2:30 AM, go to the Ninth Precinct. They will have your ID, and they will give it back to you, and issue you a ticket.
  • Last night:
  • Queens bouncer: ID, please?
  • Me: [digging into purse] Actually, sir, I forgot my wallet.
  • Queens bouncer: Eh... that's fine. Come on in.
  • Me: Thanks!
  • Queens bouncer: Wait... are you 21?
  • Me: Yes.
  • Queens bouncer: Yeah, come on in.
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